Poem for a dear friend's bday

A few months ago, I confided on a colleague that I've been thinking of applying for the volunteer Executive Director of a Filipinx arts charity that she and I are both volunteering at as two board of directors. It was actually the first time that I've confided with her on something so personal. I told her that I was hesitating because I was afraid that my lived experience with dr*g misuse and someone who has a porn scene that can easily be googled using face search, would be detrimental to the organization's. She immediately asked me to go on FaceTime with her. Once she had me on screen, she asked me, "Walk me through your thought process."

"Well, I know how conservative our community can be. I'm just concerned that people might choose not to work with us if they find out about my past."

"How do you think that'll negatively affect your ability to lead?" she pressed.

I paused for a bit, then said, "I don't think it does. My lived experience has taught me, and informed my politics. It's the reason why I support safe consumption sights and fair wages for  performers."

"Exactly. Also, if there's anyone who chooses not to work with us because they want to discriminate against you, then I'm not really that interested in working with them in the first place," she reassured me.

Then she uttered the following, which I have carried with me ever since. She said, "And you know what, Jose, you are a community leader, and you have a lot to contribute. I would be happy to work with you."

Her affirmation has stayed with me because it was really the first time that anyone has ever described me as a community leader. For the most part, I've only just considered myself as someone who volunteers. Someone who works in the backgrounds.

This July was her birthday, and I wrote this poem as a gift for her.

Thank you, friend.

 

Many of us

Look to the future

Hanging on for peace

Longing for light

Waiting for good

Then comes along

You

Through your

Fierce leadership

Tender friendship

Muddling through

Reminding us

That we

Already are